


deep breaths

by Balthuza



Category: Shards of the Sun
Genre: Angst, Multi, So much angst, but at least they are talking like normal people now, they're a bunch of idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-24
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-09-26 16:07:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9910541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Balthuza/pseuds/Balthuza
Summary: Flick is on tenterhooks all day, ever since they go out in the morning.





	

Flick is on tenterhooks all day, ever since they go out in the morning. 

Cosimo’s arrival is a welcome development, if not in the matter of their quest, then at the very least from the emotional point of view. Some part of her brain makes her want to check on them constantly, but in the end she can see that they hardly need any more eyes on themselves right now. They will be fine. She’ll break their necks if they decide to be idiots again.

If is a nice distraction, for a while, but then the worry sneaks up on her again. She feels restless, barely able to sit still and wholly unable to follow any conversation whatsoever. Even when she manages to slow her mind enough to have a normal talk, part of it still wonders and paints her the pictures of all that could go wrong.

She knows they’re together and that they managed just fine for years, but that helps little. She’s emotionally exhausted still, the last few days taking their toll on her, and she switches between emotions all the time, unable to help herself. She tries to plan, changing the objective midway and then discarding the task altogether, she tries to eat, but worry makes her stomach feel like it’s filled with lead, she tries to talk, but her mind wanders. 

It would be easier if Oswald did not apparently have the target for the entire universe painted on his head. Albany is a professionalist, but not a god, there’s only so much a single person can do. Running away from the dining hall, dragging Fyr behind her she tries to run away from the pictures of just how bad this mess could end as well.

Sitting in the library she mulls over it still, and ponders whether it’s about them or trying to protect her own heart. She tries very hard not to find the answer - ignorance is bliss.

 

They bring her strawberries, a whole basket, and she doesn’t know what to say. (A part of her brain keeps going over Albany’s words, keeps repeating “ _ Of course he was hurt, of course, of course, there was nothing any of you could do, he’ll get himself killed one day and both of you will be standing on the side, useless and helpless, of course, it will be your fault, you keep breaking things, you should’ve never brought him to this damned city, it will be your fault, of course.” _ )

She’s not sure they understand and it is not something she’d ask, but they have to know at least a little and it makes her head spin. She instantly takes one, then another. They are sweet and the taste stays on her tongue until the supper. 

She realises something is wrong during the meal, can see that when normally Oswald would just shrug off Kavius’ words, now they all land like blows and he starts to run in circles in his head. She ignores the pinprick of irritation at the rebuttal and concentrates on Oswald instead. The smile he gives Albany eases some of her worry, but in the end she abandons her food and resolves to have another talk in the evening. Emotions are not her forte, she knows this well, but she’d prefer to have another awkward conversation then have this, whatever it is that put Oswald on another self-destructive spiral of worry. Albany probably knows, she thinks. She can only hope he’ll help her out if she digs herself a hole.

When she sits down on the bed again and asks, she’s not sure what to expect. The question is general enough to be shrugged off if she’s prying into something she should not be privy to, but she wants to know. The worry eats her up, and she may try to hide it, but they’re not blind.

As Oswald starts to talk, she can hear just how weary he sounds. Flick suddenly remembers the joke about assassins and feels a bit sick. She is well aware of her gift for putting a foot in her mouth, but this time she seems to have really overdone herself. 

In the end Oswald doesn’t cry but she does, unable to imagine how it feels like to wake up suddenly alone, with your parents gone. His voice sounds a bit more frayed on the edges, but he doesn’t take back the hand she squeezes too hard. 

She ends up talking as well, Oswald’s hand still in hers and Albany behind her back. She talks about worry, and fear of tomorrow, and they let her stutter it all out. It doesn’t change anything, but makes her feel a bit better to talk it all out with them. She’s half-dozing off when the memory hits her and she nearly gives Albany a heart attack, suddenly straightening up and turning to him, launching right into the story of her mother laughing out loud by the table. Albany blinks at her and curses, and Oswald snorts. There is a spark in Albany’s eye and she can’t help but hope they somehow stumble upon Grifaris the very moment they set a foot in the Underdark. She’ll miss this.

She pretends to be asleep when she entangles herself around both of them, as much as possible. 

They let her. 


End file.
